Support Each Other

Another friend of mine shared a recent experience she has had in her marriage.  This was in response to my asking for marriage advice.  I think the main thing that is so important in her message is that we need to turn to each other for advice and support, and trust each other.  Some things are hard to talk about without one person feeling defensive or attacked.  But trust me, it is always better to talk through an uncomfortable topic than to ignore it, or talk about it with others (friends and family).   So here is my friend's experience: 

"My husband & I have recently been discussing what direction to take as far as moving & a career go. Should we move? Should he just find a different job? Should he go to school?  Should I work? ETC.   It has definitely gotten a little depressing watching him go thru this struggle. He has been feeling like he's not good enough or supporting our family to the best of his ability. (His current job is based on commission & he doesn't much consider himself a salesman so he wasn't making the income we needed in our home.) My husband is a stubborn man & often times it's hard to tell him my true concerns for things without wording it just the right way.  Sometimes it's just not what he wants to hear.  With that being said, he would constantly ask me what I thought he needed to do about the whole situation & I never felt like the answer I was giving him was good enough for him (or he would stop asking, right?!) I found myself asking other family members for their advice; what they thought we should do, instead of following my husband’s guidance.  Our marriage became a wreck. I wasn't helping him make the right decisions. I wasn't supporting him. I was trying to make it about me.  Well to solve that we went to the temple with a few questions in mind hoping for some answers.  When our session was over & we met up to talk he asked me if my questions were answered. The answer I received over & over again: SUPPORT YOUR HUSBAND IN WHICHEVER CHOICE HE MAKES!

That was definitely a little hard for me to hear because I like to have some control over our lives too :) But it was so true!  I truly believe that we need to support our husbands & let them be the leaders in our home.  Especially because they are the priesthood holders.  Since I have taken that in to my heart & followed his leadership our home has definitely been a more easy-going & happy home.  We still have not had much success in our endeavor, but I have seen his confidence brighten & our marriage become a more peaceful one! Not knowing which direction our lives are going to head is hard.  But, being at peace that my husband will lead us in the right direction has helped me to reassure him that he is doing well in his choices & helps me have better trust in our marriage."